Author Topic: Ugh (pirates)  (Read 1212 times)

ZeaLitY

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Ugh (pirates)
« on: May 03, 2006, 01:31:58 am »
I was all set to come here and make some cool pirate post, and talk about how I had settled on the idea of Bartholomew Roberts being a pretty cool pirate and how I had found a book of his memoirs to read. And now, after visiting the "author's" website, I've learned that she claims the information was psychically channeled to her.

Damnit, damnit, damnit. What the hell is this? The only resource Amazon has on him is a 7th grade book about pirates.

Nevermind. Some guy named Aubrey Burl has written about him; I'll just get that. Here is the synopsis, and why I sort of think this pirate is cool:

Bartholomew Roberts, also known as Black Bart, was easily one of the most successful and deadly pirates in all of history. He went to sea at a young age and took to pirate life well. After his ship was taken by pirates, and he was made to join their ranks, Roberts proved himself and was elected captain in 1719. Two years after Roberts was made captain he had accumulated over 51 million pounds worth of treasure and had taken close to 400 ships throughout the Americas, Africa and Europe. He was fearless in battle but good to his prisoners and fair to his crew. He drank a lot of tea instead of alcohol, was well-mannered and clean shaven, and discouraged drinking and gambling among his crew. He is believed to be the first pirate to fly the skull and crossbones. Despite his brief career, Roberts created a reputation that can never be surpassed. Along with his success and bloodthirstiness, he was said to have been "an unusual character for this age, described as tall, good-looking, teetotal, and always well dressed. He possessed a ruthless skill in the piratical arts of intimidation and seamanship, and was highly regarded by his crew."

Burning Zeppelin

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #1 on: May 03, 2006, 04:30:56 am »

Mettall

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #2 on: May 03, 2006, 06:55:10 pm »
I liked Edward Teach myself. The man lit his beard on fire and gave out a horrifying bellow as a battle cry. Legend said when he died, he was stabbed by some soldier and he said 'Good work, lad!" and then was decapitated. He was the pirate for me.

(Edward Teach = Blackbeard)

V_Translanka

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2006, 04:58:15 pm »
It's pirate-ninja-robot hybrid or nothin', I say!

Burning Zeppelin

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #4 on: May 06, 2006, 04:55:46 am »

What could be more perfect...

V_Translanka

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #5 on: May 06, 2006, 07:40:30 pm »
Monkey? Now that's just absurd. What could a monkey do that a ninja or a pirate couldn't do? The ninja already covers the absurd agility and the pirate already covers the absurd stench. Monkey...who needs a monkey to throw their own crap?

Burning Zeppelin

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #6 on: May 06, 2006, 09:57:54 pm »
But monkeys are monkeys douche bag!

Ramsus

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #7 on: May 07, 2006, 10:59:37 am »
Monkey? Now that's just absurd. What could a monkey do that a ninja or a pirate couldn't do? The ninja already covers the absurd agility and the pirate already covers the absurd stench. Monkey...who needs a monkey to throw their own crap?

The monkey can mirror any of the other players. You know, monkey see, monkey do.


Radical_Dreamer

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #8 on: May 07, 2006, 09:29:27 pm »
But monkeys are monkeys douche bag!


That's a picture of a chimp. Chimps are apes, not monkeys. And the ultimate warrior is a pirate ninja zombie robot. Cearly.

V_Translanka

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #9 on: May 09, 2006, 04:56:28 pm »
Whenever you add "zombie" to such a combination, you're making something almost improbably uber-powerful...I mean, it's like giving Superman more super-powers just for the hell of it...Although I do have a certain fascination w/a Zombie-Cowgirl (as in a female cowboy...not a half-girl half-cow thing) combination...But even I know cowboys are kinda...meh...But a good cowboy character is as good as a good ronin to me.

Lord J Esq

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #10 on: May 10, 2006, 12:53:27 am »
...Although I do have a certain fascination w/a Zombie-Cowgirl (as in a female cowboy...not a half-girl half-cow thing) combination...

You can tell a lot about a person by what they put in parentheses.

Burning Zeppelin

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #11 on: May 10, 2006, 04:36:29 am »
But monkeys are monkeys douche bag!


That's a picture of a chimp. Chimps are apes, not monkeys. And the ultimate warrior is a pirate ninja zombie robot. Cearly.
Yes sir.

V_Translanka

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #12 on: May 10, 2006, 05:09:07 pm »
...Although I do have a certain fascination w/a Zombie-Cowgirl (as in a female cowboy...not a half-girl half-cow thing) combination...

You can tell a lot about a person by what they put in parentheses.

I don't get it.

Burning Zeppelin

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Re: Ugh (pirates)
« Reply #13 on: May 11, 2006, 04:43:35 am »
He means that only you could think of that (hi, I'm burning zeppelin, I come from Sydney, Australia, and I like cheese. A lot.)