I agree with you on one count, nightmare: Even though I wish we hadn't had this war, I am not cool with us just up and leaving Iraq. We done ruined those people's shit; I don't even want to get into the fact that the relatively emancipated women of Iraq are going to go back to the stone age of strict Islamic law. Then there're the some hundred thousand civilians who got killed since Saddam was unseated, making our occupation worse for them than his rule ever was.
Nevertheless, short of tripling or quadrupling the number of troops we have in Iraq, staying there is only going to make things even worse. We have failed. We were doomed from the start, because the administration had a hopeless postwar strategy, and we have seen the consequences of our ignorance come to pass.
I want our troops out of Iraq as soon as we can logistically extract them, because they're not doing anything over there but getting themselves and more Iraqis killed. As much as it horrifies me to think of leaving Iraq to genocide and religious barbarism, victory is not an option and apparently it never was. We have but two choices now: Leave and accept the horrible thing we did to another sovereign people, or stay and do even worse to them--at extreme cost in American blood and treasure.
The word "dilemma" in its strict form means "two choices." I think that word is apt here.