The $%*! frustration thread

[tushantin]

Frustrated with countless things.

1) My Hard Drive just crashed, and I can't afford a new one because I left my current job (why did I leave it? It's been five years, and it's time to move on with something I "love" rather than something I "have to do" and destroy my mind for money's sake). Thankfully, Ubuntu sets my filesystem on constant Read Only. But unfortunately, if my Hard Drive starts falling apart and I can't back up, this also means that all my hard-worked data and art... will be gone, lost in oblivion.

This also means I'll have start to start working on Polar Detective and the others ALL OVER AGAIN FROM SCRATCH... (and all those who are already aware of the countless months of work put into these projects know exactly how I feel; I'd rather jump off a cliff than re-do those tedious amounts of work all over again)

On the other hand, this means that my "digital past" will be dead, and I'll be reborn as a newer Neo-Artist.


2) I knew it would be difficult to move on after I've left my job at the cafe, so I'm taking things in Stride. Fortunately for me, my parents still support me (unlike most others my age, who have a hard time coping up without such support). But unfortunately for me, Pune is just no place for a striving artist or animator. I can't find a suitable job, and even if I know exactly when, where and how to look, I CAN'T do so because my cousin is getting married at January -- meaning, no jobs till February for me. And I'm still broke.


3) I NEED someone to discuss my dreams, goals, work, inspirations, etc. and have lengthy conversations with them to keep myself feeling motivated and energetic. But I have no body at the moment, and especially none in Real Life -- nobody cares what I'm up to currently, the details of my work, the stories I envision (they'd be more interested what's on Reality Shows and Anime and Movies, etc. and even if somebody DOES care about my work they don't have the necessary artistic capacity to help me out). I feel alone, as if my work and energy are of no consequence.

And this essentially makes me toss all my dreams into a bin and just play games or watch Youtube videos. And then I realize that I'm not even a "person" without my dreams and ambitions.

Oh, and people's advises? They're all "Just do this", and "You should be doing that", as if it's the easiest thing in the world. The only good that does is disrupt someone's cognition.

Being the only artist in your world is the worst thing of all.

[utunnels]

I NEED someone to discuss my dreams, goals, work, inspirations, etc. and have lengthy conversations with them to keep myself feeling motivated and energetic. But I have no body at the moment, and especially none in Real Life -- nobody cares what I'm up to currently, the details of my work, the stories I envision (they'd be more interested what's on Reality Shows and Anime and Movies, etc. and even if somebody DOES care about my work they don't have the necessary artistic capacity to help me out). I feel alone, as if my work and energy are of no consequence.

Yeah, that is one of the reason why real life sometimes sucks. You should feel lucky since you are much younger than me. My real life friends are usually too busy to discuss dreams. Besides, everyone has their own goals and things they have to do, making it even harder to find someone that can help you out. Just a few months ago a friend of mine had a long conversation with me about doing something really cool. But soon I found it's not easy at all, neither of us seems to have enough time. Now we are planning to make a tower defence game for android, but he has not finished drawing a usable character so far so I'm getting bored and begin to use sprites from Chrono Trigger to test my functions. LOL I have a bad feeling that it won't get finished.

And internet communities are usually just too loose, there could be decent places to learn basic skills, but when it comes to lengthy conversations and other time consuming actions, few are interested. Instant messaging tools are worse that forums, people tend to talk about their little hobbies, complain about real life, posting random pictures, etc.  

1) My Hard Drive just crashed

Hmm, I never experienced that. Perhaps electrical supply is not stable in your place?
It is easier for me to back up things because my works are usually in code format, I just toss a package into my mail box periodically. But if you have gigabytes of data, you'd better buy a removable device. Though they are usually less safe than your hard drive.

[tushantin]

But I still believe that part of the dream-sharing scenario is where you end up having companions to tackle a mutual goal. If not exactly lending a hand, an ear usually suffices to help. It's all about meeting the "right people".

At least pertaining to my experience: I've always helped in keeping my folks motivated, but there doesn't seem one for me... Hell, if not a "person", then at least a "thing" would count. If I'm supposed to take on my dreams alone, then I better get clever and think of something or I'm going to fall apart into oblivion...

1) My Hard Drive just crashed

Hmm, I never experienced that. Perhaps electrical supply is not stable in your place?

In India, it never is stable, counting all the countless unannounced power cuts either for few minutes or long hours. Of course, it's worst in villages. Though, looking back at the past years, I think it's getting better.

[utunnels]

Unexpected power cut is the most infamous hard drive killer. Perhaps you need to find a ups device if that still happens too often.

[Schala Zeal]

I have a battery backup that lasts about 40 minutes, with surge (and maybe Serge?) protection

[tushantin]

Every data I had on the HDD... all my files, my art, my hard-worked videos, my games (not the ones I play, but the ones I MAKE), the project files for AEHU, Fleabane, my novels, portfolio, even Polar Detective that I worked so hard on....

... are gone....

*gets a heart attack*

Why... why are things for a poor man so damn hard? My years of work are gone... I'm back where I started, on ground zero, and need to work up all the way. Hell, even the voices that most people gave me for Polar Detective are GONE... Thankfully, my novels still are synced via Ubuntu One, so it's not a total loss...

*breaks everything around him, runs around vengefully and starts swearing at random people, vents, whines, cries, then returns*

......Okay, I feel better now.

Unexpected power cut is the most infamous hard drive killer. Perhaps you need to find a ups device if that still happens too often.

That's the thing: I HAVE a UPS. UPS is always important here, because power cuts are too frequent, and being a working from a hardware store I've known that.

[utunnels]

The last hope is find a local hard drive data recovery service (I'm afraid you have tried consider the situation you are having).

[Acacia Sgt]

Ugh, in a combination of a little carelessness and some very competent thief, my laptop and 3DS were stolen.

If I can't get them back it'll be at least July for a replacement 3DS. Sigh, such is life I'm afraid...

[tushantin]

...I think I just wrote a novel's worth of fanfiction, but couldn't write a novel's worth of actual novel? There must be something wrong with me...

[Thought]

Fanfiction is an entirely legitimate genre. Just look at all the Star Trek/Star Wars novels out there.

[skylark]

Fanfiction is an entirely legitimate genre. Just look at all the Star Trek/Star Wars novels out there.

*rimshot*

.........

Oh wait, were you serious?

[Thought]

Yup, I was serious. I believe it is Michael Stackpole who is the best paid fiction writer out there, has the chops to write whatever might please you, and he's written dozens of Star Wars novels. What would be the big difference between writing Star Wars fan fic vs historical fiction? In both  cases you are working with pre-established worlds, people, etc.

[tushantin]

Just one difference: I'm broke, and the fiction I just wrote was for the pleasure of my readers, but based on the per-established world created by that one company who doesn't care about its customer base.

I just wrote for pleasure knowing, though my readers only seem to be two people, they found it a splendidly amusing read. But because that doesn't seem to qualify as "serious" art for strange reasons that might qualify my progress...

...I need to finish that Clueless now...

[tushantin]

They say humanity has free will*, especially with the growth of civilizations. And the Indian politicians seem to attest to it!

But we can't be what we wanna be (which completely ruins that "Bacardi" advert soundtrack). We can't do what we wanna do. We can't go where we wanna go (even if it means having to deal with the wilderness with our lives). We can't believe what we wanna believe. We (mostly women) can't even drive with helmets, have chowmein (mostly men), or even be "liberated" from strange politics and cross-firings. Heck, I can't even take photos of the Kolkatta underground metro railways (aka, "Subway Railways")! (I was let off with a warning, with all pictures deleted, otherwise and next time I'd get a criminal record by being locked up in prison)

Oh, humanity...


* Not the Christian Free Will, but the "Agency" thingy. You know.

P.S.: Yes, I'm trigger happy. I take pictures for art's sake, not to defame people by uploading it to I Can Haz Cheezburger (although I should start doing that now... or maybe, later...)

[tushantin]

Now my netbook is dead...

...

*sigh*