Sorry, folks, for almost a week of delay on my deadline. Welcome to the world of creative writing, huh?
Anyways, here’s the next episode to enjoy. It’s a landmark episode for me seeing how it’s the first one in the series to include an emoticon of any kind.
* * * * * *CRONO: It’s the same show with a new twist.
MARLE: Seven people living under one roof.
LUCCA: Getting to know each other better.
FROG: Privy to their flaws and faults.
ROBO: Tolerating their illogical actions.
MAGUS: Wishing they could get a moment’s peace.
AYLA: This Real World – Chrono Trigger.
EPISODE SIX: The Big Case Part 3, and Crono’s Early DepartureLUCCA (Interview): Ever since Robo decided to be my representation in this case, our group’s lawyer has decided to pull out on us. I think it’s because he fears his extensive knowledge of legal counseling and patent processing.
INTERVIEWER: Didn’t you say earlier it was because he had a computer his your body?
LUCCA (Interview): That, too. Hey, intimidation only works if you can “back it up”. Get it?
INTERVIEWER: 
…no.
INT. COURTROOM – DAYJUDGE: Mr. Bekkler, the floor is yours.
Norstein Bekkler floats over the plaintiff’s table, towards the jury, and lets out his trademark laugh.NORSTEIN: (Sinister) Leggies and Jangle-Fans—*clears throat* (Composed) Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury…and the occasional amphibian mix…
FROG: (To himself) How didst fate ever see to me being a juror?
NORSTEIN: …I will present to you undeniable evidence and eyewitness testimony that I, Norstein Bekkler, am the original inventor of the homemade portable lie detector, and that Lucca Ashtear is guilty of being nothing more than a smarter-than-your-average copycat.
ROBO: (Extends his Crisis Arm) Objection!
The sound of a weapon charging its energy rings throughout the courtroom. Everybody in earshot gasps and starts to shuffle in their seats away from Robo.JUDGE: (Bangs his gavel) Robo! Get rid of that weapon attached to your arm!
ROBO: But I can’t. Only the party leader can equip and unequip weapons and armor.
JUDGE: And who’s your party leader?
ROBO: Crono, but he’s not here right now. Here, I’ll leave the safety on while security escorts him here. (Switches his safety on)
JUDGE: (Heaves a sigh) If we get a police service to bring Crono here, then you can never use an objection for the rest of this trial.
ROBO: Agreed, you Honor. (Bows, then sits down)
NORSTEIN: As I was saying… where was I at? Oh, yes. I’d like to call up Bob, the patent clerk.
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Name: Bob Burpsaplenty
Gender: Male
Occupation: Patent Clerk
Likes: Archiving ridiculous patents (e.g. Parachute hat)
Dislikes: Not having a personality, his surname
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NORSTEIN: Mister Burpsaplenty, according to the records at the patent office you work at, how long ago did I register my invention?
BOB: About two weeks and three days ago.
NORSTEIN: And was the registration in question for my homemade portable lie detector?
BOB: Yes, it was.
NORSTEIN: And is it true that some time after the date of registration that you also registered a patent similar to my own in both composition and function?
BOB: I believe I did. At least, I think I did.
NORSTEIN: (Whips out some papers) Your honor, this documentation is a reprinted copy of the patent for my device which was filed at the time specified by Mister Burpsaplenty. What does the timestamp read on the document, Bob?
Norstein Bekkler shows Bob Burpsaplenty the documents. Bob looks near the bottom of the first page. BOB: The twenty-second of August?
The jurors murmur amongst themselves, except Frog. One murmurs to Frog. FROG: (To himself) Watermelon, Cantaloupe, Walla-Walla? What cryptic tongue be mine fellow jurors speaking?
NORSTEIN: Thank you, Mister Burpsaplenty. Robo, your witness.
Norstein Bekkler floats over to his table, lets out his trademark laugh. Robo stands up, approaches Bob. ROBO: Mister Burpsaplenty, when did you say that you filed Mister Bekkler’s patent?
BOB: Two weeks and three days ago.
ROBO: And was the documentation provided to you by Mister Bekkler authentic?
BOB: I believe it was.
ROBO: There’s a difference between believing something and knowing something. According to your profile, Mister Burpsaplenty, you like to archive ridiculous patents. What do you make of a homemade portable lie detector?
BOB: I… I- I don’t know if they’re legitimate or not. At least, I think they are. I don’t know, the idea sounds kind of odd to me.
ROBO: Shaky answer, Mister Burpsaplenty. (Takes some documents out of his chest) Your Honor, these are the archives for the patent office that Bob works at. Mister Burpsaplenty, is the homemade portable lie detector listed amongst these patents?
Robo shows Bob the documents. Bob scans the page over. BOB: No, sir.
ROBO: So, let’s add this up. You claim not to know the legitimacy of a homemade portable lie detector, and yet you chose not to archive these two patents? Let the record show that Mister Burpsaplenty has just made a contradiction.
The jurors murmur amongst themselves, except Frog. One murmurs to Frog. FROG: (To himself) What must one learn to master such language? Be there a book on this?
ROBO: No further questions, your honor.
Robo and Bob take their respective seats. LUCCA (Interview): I think this is going pretty well. Robo seems to know what he’s doing. What I don’t understand is how Frog got onto the jury.
FROG (Interview): I will reward most handsomely the soul who can translate the nonsense spoken by mine fellow jurors. How elst can I reach an impartial answer? One even did propose to cast lots for Lucca’s innocence. ‘Tis but a wagon of billycock!
INT. LIVING ROOM - MEANWHILE Magus is sitting down watching Unsolved Mysteries starring Schala Zeal as the missing person. Ayla and Crono enter the room. Magus mutters a few words under his breath. The TiVo pauses the program. MAGUS: What do you two want?
AYLA: Ayla look for man who steal Ayla spare skin. Ayla know that man steal it.
CRONO: She’s been bugging me all day about it. She bugged me while I was making Baked Alaska and while I was working the oven. Just tell us what you know.
MAGUS: Take your search somewhere else.
AYLA: Ayla no leave until pale man with sharp rock pole speaks truth.
CRONO: I burned my hands while placing the pans in the oven.
AYLA: Ayla know pale man know who steal Ayla spare skin.
MAGUS: So, what’s the problem? You found your underwear. Let bygones be bygones.
AYLA: Ayla think one-eyed god hypnotize pale man into no speak truth… and what be bygone? Ayla not know.
CRONO: (Shows his hands) I got untreated second-degree burns from half an hour ago.
MAGUS: This one-eyed god is my only relief from the rest of you. Besides, it’s not like either of you can fight me for the truth.
Crono raises a finger to object, but stops and hangs his head in shame. CRONO: He’s right. Let’s go look somewhere else, Ayla. (Drags Ayla away)
AYLA: Ayla know pale man steal Ayla spare skin! Ayla knooooooooooooowwwww!!
Magus chuckles to himself, mutters a few more words, and his program resumes. MAGUS (Interview): Yeah, I’m still searching for my sister, even though I’m stuck with these kids. It’s what keeps me going through the week. I’ll find her someday, but until then, I can always watch my favorite childhood sitcom,
It Happened in Zeal.
INT. HALLWAY - LATERCrono approaches Marle’s room with the finished Baked Alaska on a silver tray. Ayla follows behind Crono with a bottle of dark rum. CRONO: Okay, Ayla. Pour that on the cake.
Ayla pours the dark rum on the Baked Alaska. [/b]AYLA: [/b] What this black water do to white mud food, Crono?
CRONO: It makes the cake go flambé.
AYLA: Go what? Crono speak funny.
CRONO: (Groans) Black water make white mud food turn hot. Okay, stop.
Ayla stops pouring the dark rum and sets it aside. She picks up a box of matches. [/b]AYLA: [/b] Now Ayla use little fire stick?
CRONO: Not yet. I have to knock first.
Crono raises his fist to knock, but there’s a knock at the front door instead. Crono stops. CRONO: Hold this, Ayla.
Crono hands Ayla the Baked Alaska and approaches the front door. He peeks through the peephole and spots five or so officers gathered the front door. Crono opens the door. CRONO: Something wrong, officers?
Officer #1: Are you Crono of Truce?
CRONO: Uh… yes?
Officer #1: Good. Take ‘im, boys.
The officers swarm around Crono, subdue him, and escort him out the door. CRONO: Marle! Help! It's the Trial all over again! I can still hear the music...!
The officers continue to pull Crono down the hallway. Meanwhile, Ayla strikes a match against the wall and touches the flame to the Baked Alaska. It catches fire right away. Marle opens her door and peeks out. Ayla steps back.MARLE: Crono, what are you yelling about!? (Looks at the cake, gasps) Baked Alaska?
* * * * * *
End of Episode Six. To be continued… (I hope)
