Crazy theories?

[Delta Dragon]

Had kind of a stupid one earlier today.  I was talking to a sibling about Chrono cross characters and we got on the topic of Turnip.  Since he's very similar to Frog it got me thinking.  To get him you need to use the Ice breath from the Water dragon on the burnt part correct?  Been a while since I played that part. 

Okay so the breath from the water dragon cleaned a patch of dead soil, took probably a seed already in the ground and made it alive and be just like Frog.  So my my crazy theory is that the Water dragon is actually Frog.  It looks like a Frog, it uses water elements like frog, and it's breath makes more Frogs so maybe his condition over time got worse and he grew into the monstrosity on Water dragon isle. 

And yes.  I know the theory is stupid and full of contradictions.  This was just something I thought of randomly.  It is the crazy theory thread after all right?   

[Thought]

I am annoyed by the quality of the thought-process represented in the song "Last Christmas." Not a particular rendition of it, mind you, but the lyrics of it. Either the singer gave his or her heart to someone un-special last Christmas, indicating aberrant heart-giving behaviors, or that individual to whom the heart was given was special at the time but ceased to be so, indicating the possibility that this year will be a repeat of last year, and in turn indicating an impulsive nature on the singer’s part which increases the likelihood of “tears,” which s/he is trying to avoid.

Hmm… maybe this song is really a cry for help, as the singer is caught in a cycle of poor judgment in which every year he or she gives their heart to someone who only appears to be “special” but is, in reality, cruel. This would explain why this song gets played every year; each year it doesn't refer to the same historical event but rather it is a commemoration of multiple events, akin to the "Birthday Song" that one might hear every birthday. Given this loop, it would seem that the singer is incapable of breaking this aberrant heart-giving cycle him or herself. An intervention may be necessary.

[Uboa]

Maybe s/he keeps meeting a shapeshifter?

[tushantin]

1) Blue Dragon from Chrono Cross originally had his own game named after him since he protested against lack of screentime, but was replaced by another "cooler" version of Dragon.

2) When Pierre's granddaughter married Tata's son, they decided to name all their children and grandchildren "Pierre".

2) Michael Jackson is alive. Niki is him in disguise.

3) Turnip and Draggy were originally from Walt Disney cartoons.

4) Trunks from Dragonball Z is the Chrono Trigger of that timeline (hey, I'm serious!)

5) Magus appeared in Incest at least once.

6) Kid was inspired by Kitty Jones.

7) I think I'm on acid....

[Kodokami]

6) Kid was inspired by Kitty Jones.

I think Kitty Jones was inspired by Kid, considering she came three years after CC (unless I have a different Kitty Jones in mind).

...Draggy does look like something from Disney, haha.

[GenesisOne]

As a movie buff, I have a couple of crazy theories myself (with reasons why it would work):

1. Zion is part of The Matrix. (It would explain why Neo can still use his powers in the physical world, though to this day, I still find Zion to be a complex impossibility)

2. Ferris Beuller was a figment of Cameron's imagination. (It would explain the city of Chicago rallying for Bueller's "illness" and the whole song-and-dance number in the downtown parade)

3. Chewbacca and R2-D2 are secret Rebel agents. (It would explain C-3PO's, but not R2's, memory wipe in the original trilogy.  It would also explain why Chewbacca, a high-ranking soldier, would be friends with a lowlife smuggler like Han Solo)

Anyways, that's my take on it.  What says you?

[Thought]

1. Zion is part of The Matrix. (It would explain why Neo can still use his powers in the physical world, though to this day, I still find Zion to be a complex impossibility)

Ah, come on, it totally makes sense that a highly complex self-contained city could be built without the "Machines" knowing and it is a well established fact that computers suck as mapping and cracking codes.

<.<
>.>

2. Ferris Beuller was a figment of Cameron's imagination. (It would explain the city of Chicago rallying for Bueller's "illness" and the whole song-and-dance number in the downtown parade)

That would make an awesome Master's Thesis.

3. Chewbacca and R2-D2 are secret Rebel agents. (It would explain C-3PO's, but not R2's, memory wipe in the original trilogy.  It would also explain why Chewbacca, a high-ranking soldier, would be friends with a lowlife smuggler like Han Solo)

Didn't Chewy owe Han a life debt or some such?

As for the mind-wipes, don't forget Obi-Wan. He hung out with C-3P0 and R2D2 for a several years but then has no idea about them or what significance they might have.

[GenesisOne]

Funny you should mention the Machines in such a context... <-- Realism Alert!

The whole idea of "the Matrix" (not the films, but the machines which sustain the humans) doesn't make any sense. 

The computer needs people as a power source, right? Well, the food fed to humans would have far more energy than the meager power available from humans. It would require even more energy to run the food delivery system, let alone maintain the slime tubs. Why would the Machines bother? Surely there'd be a more effective way to extract energy from the food.

But wait! It gets worse. Liquefied dead humans are fed back to the living ones. The movie comes dangerously close to implying that the computer/energy system is a giant perpetual motion machine. This is clearly impossible according to the second law of thermodynamics and likewise impossible for us to dismiss lightly. 

To cover itself up, the movie throws in a quick mention that the human energy source powering the machines is combined with a source of fusion. This is like getting on a 747 and having the captain explain in great detail that the plane is rubber-band powered, then add that it also has four jet engines. Guess which power source gets it off the ground?

[skylark]

5) Magus appeared in Incest at least once.

7) I think I'm on acid....

........I don't think #5 is a theory, though.  I mean, I know Schala's hot, but god... >_<

And the fact that I'm even discussing this right now might mean that #7 holds true for me as well. *cough*

[Temporal Knight]

I had to post this, but somewhere there is a site that has the most stupid ideas ever. I know this because I have a friend that prints them off and reads them to me every once-in-a-while. Many of them are so stupid, it's funny.

Such as a theory.

What if lightbulbs didn't really heat up and glow to produce the light in a dark room? What if they really just sucked the dark out of the room and left the light behind?

...

Really?

[Truthordeal]

Sounds like the theory is a tad...



Unenlightened.

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[chi_z]

In case something does happen, I'll warn you guys; there might be a false flag in the next zwei tage:
"Just learned that there’s a Navy-wide exercise this coming Mon. Mar. 22 and Tues. Mar. 23 during which, as currently planned, U.S. bases/ commands will be at ‘Charlie’ (C) security level on Monday and then at DELTA (D) security level on Tuesday, March 23. To the best of my knowledge, the last time we were at ‘Delta’ was the day of 9/11, then reduced not too long after 9/11 to ‘Charlie’. My understanding is that the base security levels correspond to DEFCON levels, and that Delta is very high. There’s also something strange about the lack of general alert to personnel on the base where I work, the Naval Postgraduate School (NPS) in Monterey, Calif., about this exercise, as I’m told that other Navy bases in our Navy S.W. Region alerted their personnel to this exercise as much as a month ago, and that Navy instructions were/are for all bases to do the same, yet so far there has been no all hands alert at NPS, and I was also told that someone said they didn’t understand why there was all the ’secrecy’ surrounding the coming exercise for NPS and not elsewhere."
http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread554070/pg1

[Truthordeal]

Doesn't seem like much more than a drill, but should something happen, Chi_z, I'll nominate you and the people at ATS for a cabinet position.

[chi_z]

I'm holding you to that lol. Really it's the navy guy's doing, takes balls to come out and say stuff like that with your career/reputation on the line.

[Mr Bekkler]

As a movie buff, I have a couple of crazy theories myself (with reasons why it would work):

1. Zion is part of The Matrix. (It would explain why Neo can still use his powers in the physical world, though to this day, I still find Zion to be a complex impossibility)

2. Ferris Beuller was a figment of Cameron's imagination. (It would explain the city of Chicago rallying for Bueller's "illness" and the whole song-and-dance number in the downtown parade)

3. Chewbacca and R2-D2 are secret Rebel agents. (It would explain C-3PO's, but not R2's, memory wipe in the original trilogy.  It would also explain why Chewbacca, a high-ranking soldier, would be friends with a lowlife smuggler like Han Solo)

Anyways, that's my take on it.  What says you?

I say that's from Cracked! But I love those theories (particularly the Ferris one, one of my favorite movies anyway), and the additional one about Seth Rogen's character from Observe and Report: the entire second half after he goes on his date with Brandy and gives away his meds, takes place in his head.





Crazy theory: Ted Woolsey is a racist. Toward asians.

Evidence: He thought Square pronounced, and thus spelled, Sara's name wrong, so he changed it "back" to the "original" name, Schala.